are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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