my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
