talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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