rhymes with "ouble enetration"
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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