'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize