I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
