we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
You can't just leave with hair like that
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
