She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize