if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
BRING THE BAGELS
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