how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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