Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
