Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
