Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Randomize
