I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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