that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
