pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
