So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
