i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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