i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
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That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
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It was like giving head to a cactus.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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