Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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