Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
