You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
