Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize