they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
no you cant smoke seaweed
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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