This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.