Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
