how do flat chested girls get laid?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
