White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Randomize
