Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
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