what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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