Why are handjobs necessary in class?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
17 People Reveal The Reasons Behind Their Foot Fetish
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.