upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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