u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
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im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
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He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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