Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
