I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize