Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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