Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize