I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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