you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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