Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
