hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
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Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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