Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Randomize
