i just wanna soil my oats bro
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Randomize