exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
