i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
He felt like a one man threesome
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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