You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
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