Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
