Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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