8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Those nachos came to me in a dream
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
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