dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
