Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize